NOT NORMAL...

Not really sure about writing tonight...or is it morning...  I can't sleep and that usually means my mind is too busy bouncing thoughts around to actually shut off for awhile and sleep.  Well tonight/today...I got nothing....  Forgive my country girl grammar, I'm not feeling very prim and proper right now.  I'm not really sure what I'm feeling.  Have you ever been there?  Felt this way?  You know...like you want to scream, or yell, or maybe cry, or laugh?  You might even just want to curl up and sleep all day or you are wide awake and totally unsettled but you don't know why?  Well, that is me right now.  I don't really know how to feel tonight.

Yesterday, since it is almost 1:00 a.m. now, was Easter Sunday.  Resurrection Sunday as we call it!  Which normally means everyone goes to church because it is a special Sunday.  It is the day when much of the world stops for a moment to remember that Christ died for our sins and on the third day was resurrected.  Our church celebrates this every Sunday with communion, but on this one Sunday all Christians remember this together.

In today's world it also means new pretty dresses for little girls with their new summer sandles, and for little boys maybe their first suit or a really nice color coordinated shirt and pants to match dad or mom. It means family pictures in our coordinated outfits either in the bluebonnets or some other pretty spot.   It means seeing family for Sunday lunch after worship and then a fun filled egg hunt for the kids.  In our family it also means seeing those cousins you only see once a year and trying to smash confetti eggs on their heads before they can smash one on your's!  It means spending time with family for a few short hours until the kids get tired and it is time to go home and take naps and sort through all the candy filled eggs.

But, yesterday was different.  None of those things happened like normal.  Oh, there were pretty dresses and coordinating shirts.  There were little egg hunts and family meals.  There were church services, just on the internet instead of in person.  I even saw some family pictures that were taken, but not necessarily in the bluebonnets or even in Easter clothes.  I'm sure people got Easter baskets and talked about the Easter bunny.  I'm sure some of those things still happened, but just not like normal.

NOTHING HAS BEEN NORMAL!  I watched two church services this morning.  One was on Facebook Live from a church in Louisiana and the other was on YouTube from our home church.  I chatted with other church members via the chat application on the two computer programs.  We prayed, had communion and even sang, as well as heard the lesson from God's word for the week.  I just did all of that, though, in my pjs, sitting in my recliner, drinking my coffee.

I saw my grandchildren and sort of saw all of my daughters.  However, it was only in pictures, Snapchat and Facetime on the phone.  I talked to my momma, but it was only through a text.  I told my friend Happy Easter...but it was through a text also.  And my poor grands had an egg hunt, but only with their siblings, not with their cousins like normal.  No family pictures this year.  No confetti eggs and family eggs fights.  No family dinner with the great-grandparents, aunts, uncles and distant cousins.  No worship service face to face.  No actual human contact at all.  My hubby even picked up groceries today....we shopped online and just drove up and received our groceries and drove home.  No browsing of the aisles and shopping bargains.  Nope.  Nothing has been normal.

This lack of human contact is not easy, even for those of us who do like our quiet alone time.  I like to hide away in my house and just be...quiet...for a while.  I need those days of less outside stimulation and more of my inner peace and rest.  But, we are starting WEEK 5 of being home and like most people like to call it, "quarantined!"  We really aren't quarantined, but we are "sheltered at home" which basically means, DON'T GO ANYWHERE UNLESS IT IS AN EMERGENCY or if you have what is now referred to as an "essential" job.  So for many people it has been a long time since they have had actual human contact with someone else.  Think about that for a minute.  No hand shakes.  No face to face conversations. No school.  No entertainment.  No hugs.  No sports.  No interaction that involves "touching" someone else.  It is WEIRD!  And I pray this is NOT our new normal.  People are wearing masks that cover their faces and gloves to protect their hands from germs.  I have antiviral/antibacterial wipes in my car to wipe down everything any time I get in or out.  Hand sanitizer is a MUST and is carried everywhere you go.  Things are just crazy weird right now!

The talk has been about what things will be like as we "open our economy back up."  You know me, I just was thinking life would go back to regular life.  However, the more I listen to the news (which is a bad thing to do during a pandemic) the more I think we may have a new normal now.  Things I have heard:  Will we be tracked or identified by if we have the antibodies for this virus or not?  Will we be required to wear face coverings/masks in large gatherings?  Will some things not be reopened?  Will people be scanned with some type of thermometer when they enter buildings to determine if they are healthy enough to be around others?  Will things become more of a military state with enforcing the social distancing rules?  (People in Kentucky were cited for being at a place of worship today and there were several consequences listed for this citation.)  Will this become something that we will have a vaccine for like the flu and we will be able to go back to normal?  The questions go on and on and on ....and if I let myself dwell on them I can get very anxious and sad.

Here is what I do know.  God does not change.  Jesus is still the same today as He was before this pandemic started and He will be the same when it is over. (Hebrews 13:8)  He has not forgotten or forsaken us. (Deuteronomy 31:6) He has not turned his back on us.  He still loves us and He is still in control of all that is going on in this world today.  I know some of you are like me and you have that thought pop into your head...you know...that one you should NOT have.  That thought that says, "Well, if He is in control then WHY hasn't He done something about this by now?"  I ask myself that a lot.  I don't know why God allows these bad things to happen.  I wish we did get to live in that utopia that was the Garden of Eden, where there was no evil, or pain, or sickness, and I'm sure that means there was no virus that attacked them from out of the blue.  But we don't get to live in that perfect place.  We will have to have a conversation with Eve one of these days...and with Adam.  Both are guilty in my book for this fallen world that we live in today.

When these bad things have happened in my life, things like the job losses that we have been through, or the unfair situations that have happened, I try to find the lesson or the good that is coming from it.  Let me tell you...there is good in this pandemic.  I've seen it!  Parents are getting to stay home more with their children!  Children are getting to learn from their parents!  Children are getting to live in a slower paced, more relaxed setting (hopefully...I know it is not true for all of them).  Parents are getting to work from home instead of fighting the traffic and making the hour commute to work and back each day.  Neighbors are speaking to each other more because families are going outside to "get out of the house" and "do something."  People are building relationships with their neighbors!  People are reaching out and calling each other instead of just sending a text.  People are delivering groceries and supplies to families to help make it through this time.  I've even seen people join the online worship services that have not set foot in a church building in years, but they are joining in online!  I've heard the news mention that air pollution is less, the skies are clearer than they have been in years because there are not as many cars on the road.  Gas prices are lower than they have been since my girls were little.  I've heard it described as like someone hit the "reset" button and we are all paused while the system reboots.

There are so many other good things happening in the midst of all this pandemic and the bad that we keep hearing about.  People are sick and dying and we do need to do what we are asked to do to help stop the spread so we can get back to normal sooner than later.  But let's really think about normal and what we want it to look like.  Maybe some things did need to change.  Maybe this is a time that we look at our lives and what we are really missing or what we are really enjoying and as we reboot the system, we choose what becomes our new normal.

Just remember, my friends, God is with us.  He has not changed.  He has not left us alone.  He will get us through this crazy time and He will be with us as we venture into the new that will come.  I don't know about you, but that gives me HOPE!  And as long as we have hope we have something to offer this world....let's start by being Jesus to those who need Him the most.  We will get through this together...with God.

(Wow...I didn't know where this was going tonight...hope it makes a little bit of sense.)

In Him,
Denise

Passover...

Tomorrow is Palm Sunday, April 5th.  The day we remember that Jesus rode into the city of Jerusalem on a donkey.  It begins the Holy Week leading up to Easter for Christians.  Passover begins at  sundown on April 8th and goes through April 16th. A time of remembrance of their deliverance from slavery in Egypt for Jewish people.  Passover specifically refers to the last of the ten plagues of Egypt, when God passed over Egypt and took the first born of each Egyptian family and any others unless they had the blood of an unblemished lamb on the door frame of their homes.  Easter comes in the middle of Passover this year on the 12th of April. 


So why the history lesson?  Because it has been on my mind a lot lately and tonight they showed The Ten Commandments movie, as is done each year around Easter, and I have just finished sitting through the 3 hours of watching it...again.  It is one of our favorite movies.  It is one of the first movies that my hubby watched as he was learning about God and finding his salvation. 

I remember sitting around the television as my girls were growing up and explaining the movie and the Bible story to them.  God had told His children to prepare to leave.  He had been specific in what to eat and prepare.  He had given instructions as to how to protect themselves when He passed over.  The first born children inside the homes with blood on the doors would be saved.  Spared from death and set free from bondage by the blood of the lamb.  

I also remember the questions about "why".  Why would God do that to people?  Why would he allow people to suffer and even die?    And I remember the eerie feeling as the "angel of death" passed over the homes in Egypt. That grey fog, creeping through the streets and the wailing heard as the plague took the first born in the homes not covered with the blood, would make my girls fearful and sad. I also remember the fear that some of those inside the homes covered by the blood still showed as they worshiped and prayed throughout the night.   They had to know that God was moving for them, protecting them, freeing them, as they prepared for what would come next.  What would morning bring? 

I don't have all the answers to why...but I do know that God is a good god and He is in control no matter what.  I don't like thinking that bad things happen as a punishment or as a way to get our attention, but when I read the Bible I find many times that God allowed things to happen to help bring His people back to Him.  It took ten plagues to get Pharaoh's attention.  I like to believe that if Pharaoh's heart had not been so hard toward God's people that maybe his people would not have had to suffer so much before he listened to God. 

So am I saying that this is a plague and we are being punished?  No.  I am not.  However, I can see a great comparison to the story of Moses.  Before this current situation the bickering and negativity towards people was great!  You couldn't get on any social media without seeing something about the election and it usually included a lot of mud slinging.  It just seemed that everything was filled with hate and had someone tearing down somebody else or criticizing how or why something was done.   It just wasn't a very happy place.  I also can't help but wonder about what would have happened to those first born of Israel if they had been hard headed and stubborn and not followed God's instructions of painting their doors with the blood of an unblemished lamb or if they had decided that they did not have to stay inside when the plague passed through their neighborhood.  

But today isn't much better...right?  Well, the virus has certainly made things crazy and if you watch too much television/news, you will feel like the world is ending and we will never ever go back to some kind of normal.  I wonder if the Israelites felt this way too as the first nine plagues rained down on Egypt.  Did they wish for the normal days of hard labor and slavery instead of the suffering they endured during the plagues?   I know I have felt those things and I have to fight hard to not get sucked into the doom and gloom and live there.  The stories of stores closing, people losing their jobs, all the new rules that come with just trying to go to the store, the lack of tp (yes, that is still an issue), and the constant update of new cases of the virus and number of deaths is all enough to make anyone feel overwhelmed.

When I start feeling those overwhelming feelings I have to start looking for the good that is going on.  Turn off the negative.  Log off the constant flow of emotions, and focus on what is good.  I also have learned to find the lesson in the trials.  What am I figuring out during this time?  What is being reset in my life during this time out?  What is important in my life?  What is God teaching me?  I know for one that I am going to live with more gratitude and not take simple things like going to work or seeing my parents or kids, for granted.  I also am going to continue making time for me instead of living at work.  And...my relationship with God needs to improve.  I won't take for granted the ability to join together with other Christians and worship.  

Look at what is happening around us now.  People are actually talking to each other instead of being too busy to look up.  Families are having dinner together and playing games.  Children are learning from their parents.  Parents are home more and not being pulled in a 100 different directions.  Children are getting time to be children.  Churches are reaching out via the internet and finding new ways to connect.  I know of several people who have logged onto the online worship services that have not been inside a church building in years.  There are so many people who are taking extra steps to help others.  We had groceries delivered to us during the first week of social distancing.  My mom and several other ladies are sewing face masks for medical personnel and first responders.  Companies are changing up their normal jobs to make what is needed most for right now.  People are reading books to children online.  Teachers are still teaching, children are still learning.  Life has slowed down and people have started checking on those they haven't gotten to talk to in awhile.  Communities are supporting one another and figuring out ways to take care of those who are unable to work right now.  They are even talking about prayer on the news.  God has to be moving.  Drawing us back into a closer walk with him and to loving one another.

I don't know when this new normal will go back to something we remember, but I hope when it does that we hold on to some of the new, good things, that we have learned.  Maybe we will be a kinder generation.  Maybe we will remember that we are "all in this together" and that "together we will get through this" time of trouble.  Call it a test, a trial, a pandemic, a plague, but whatever you may call it remember that God is with us as we go through it.  Some days the struggle is real.  The isolation is too much.  The television or computer have outworn their welcome.  The rain just will not stop.  The people you are cooped up with are about to drive you crazy.  You may wonder if the sun will ever shine again and if we will ever get to just relax and go back to living life together.  I pray those things happen for us soon, but honestly, I have no idea what the future holds.  However, I do know who has made a promise to be with us through whatever may come. 

There are several things that many are doing to help unite us during this time of Passover and Easter.  The Palm Sunday idea is posted at the beginning of this post.  Another idea has been to tie a red ribbon on your door to represent the covering of the blood of the lamb that we share as Christians, as we go into the season of Passover and Easter.  Praying also for His deliverance from this virus and the fear that many feel is also being suggested.  One thing I believe we all can do...even through face masks, is smile at people.  Make eye contact and speak to others.   Say "hello" when you see people.   Do not let a spirit of fear destroy who we are as people.  


Blessings...
Denise